Abandoned hot dogs: the unspoken mystery

Today in the world of the Internet I started a new research project regarding the world’s favorite phallic-shaped, baseball treat: the hot dog. But to be more specific, is there a particular cluster of individuals that randomly abandons hot dogs?

Google searching “abandoned hot dog” brought up some tantalizing images that would surely infect my work computer with the gnarliest of viruses if I had the opportunity to peruse them longer (co-workers and bosses really throwing a wrench into the explicit imagery searches at the workplace).

Editing the search terms slightly (“famous abandoned hot dogs,” “people that lose hot dogs,” “getting rid of hot dogs”) generated some extremely interesting photos, including the following:

of course Miley popped up in the searches

of course Miley popped up in the searches

The reason for this current Internet sleuthing has been a current(ish) workplace quandary. One day someone brought in uncooked hot dogs in a plastic bag, took them out of the fridge, and then just left it by the sink for the entire day. This isn’t a giant break room that you’d see at some Goliath of industry. It’s the place where the free coffee lives, and anyone that goes in there once would go in there a hundred times.

photo (28)

Hour 3 of abandoned hot dog, let us reflect

In the mystery of the displaced hot dog: who is the sort of person that brings in hot dogs to their office, takes it out of the fridge, and then completely abandons it? And why leave it on the side of the sink? And did the person never ever return to the break room and see their hot dog left by the sink? And if they did come in and see it, why not throw it away? WHY IS THIS HOT DOG ABANDONED HERE?

It’s summer, topics are slow. Hot dogs are perfectly reasonable subject material.

missing hot dog

Actually, Missing Poster, I do believe that this is the correct usage of “your”

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