The LoD, Candy Corn, and Me

I have been staring at this open window to write something for almost twenty minutes, which is not exactly reflective of my lack of busy schedule but more emblematic of my lack of stuff to write about here.

But, I really want to.  

A depiction of me tending to my busy schedule and also my cat Easy Mac.

I was just talking to two of my friends about wanting to re-explore this space that I’ve owned for something like ten years, and that feels like a pretty intense length of time to have a blog. You Life has been around through the advent, rise, and fall of personal blogs and instead of pulling the plug I continue to pay for this domain year after year. I rarely update this but I always remember really enjoying doing so when I was younger; You Life always gave me the chance to create spontaneously and embrace chaos joyously.

Ostensibly, I’m a writer (or so I’ve been called), and I’ve been extremely lucky to have a number of publications and several of my books published. But, it’s hard to reconcile the fact that some of the greatest enjoyment I’ve had as a writer was before any of those publications while I was writing about how I used my fridge as a trash can for two years on this blog. And I was actually incredibly inspired by my publisher’s personal blog. I watched Josh engage with writing and the world in a unique and unencumbered way that continues to impress me so much, he writes meaningful and wonderful observations. I highly encourage anyone reading this to give his blog a check. It’s excellent and thoughtful and consciously curated with care (meaning it’s emphatically not like You Life). 

It’s freeing to have a space for writing that involves being a trash pest, a mess, a benevolent cat benefactor, and a helpful possum person. The world is exhausted with itself, and I recognize that there is important work to be done both utilizing social media and writing as well as on the ground work, and I’ll continue to do so. I can also see within myself that I’m struggling to find the humor in things. 

I can never escape me and my trash

But, tbh, I need something to do for enjoyment other than scrolling through the Bravo Real Housewives Reddit. 

However, I still don’t entirely know how to functionally use You Life (i.e. writing site, hookup site, self-call out burn book). But while I figure that out here is what I’ve been up to recently during year seven of COVID-19. It’s mostly just wrestling-related stuff.

The Road Warriors: Legion of Doom is my second favorite tag team after the Hart Foundation. I love a blend of 1970s punk rock and the aesthetics of the Mad Max movie franchise. While never a fan of motorcycles or an impending apocalypse, I do love spikes and nods to bondage. Plus, I loved their catchphrase, “what a rush.” What is the rush? What does that mean? Wrestling? Doom? Drugs? the drumming of Neil Ellwood Peart? 

Here are some impressive facts about Hawk and Animal (Michael Hegstrand) and Joseph Laurinaitis) that I never knew. While the gimmick was obviously lifted from Mad Max, did you know that they were the first in professional wrestling to successfully bring a theme from a movie and incorporate it into wrestling? 

Please also enjoy this gem that I lazily read on Wikipedia: 

Under either name, their gimmick was the same – two imposing wrestlers in face paint.

There is beautiful poetry in the simplicity of that statement. Two imposing wrestlers wearing facepaint is how I want to come back to earth. 

Lockdown had me in a bit of a drinking tailspin, which has resulted in a number of fascinating purchases. 

The first of these purchases was the WWE channel. I’ve been a huge HUGE fan of professional wrestling since my childhood. The WWE channel provided me the opportunity to travel through time and back to the happiest aspects of being a little kid and revisit matches I used to love and wrestlers who I’ve always admired. 

One of these events is Survivor Series 1991. Matches that made me lose my shit upon rewatch. I was like a bottle or two of wine deep at the time, but listen this was the Survivor Series where the Undertaker beat Hulk Hogan for the championship and the aftermath of this Survivor Series led to the iconic moment when Shawn Michaels kicked Marty Jannety through a window during Brutus “the Barber” Beefcake’s “Barber Shop.”

Also, the Road Warriors were headliners and I was VERY enamored with them under the glossy gaze of my red wine eyes. 

Inspired by this, I made an alarming purchase, as I discovered the next morning.

I have a relatively healthy collection of WWF Hasboro figures from the 90s. It will never set the world of collectors on fire, but they are treasured remnants from my childhood. I never sought to collect them all, I just got the wrestlers I really liked. 

However, I never had LoD. 

As it turns out, I decided to rectify that absence with a 2 AM EBay purchase. The cost was slightly jarring for toys. But I was doubly alarmed with the cost of these mint though not-in-package figures as a total. And that was because of the cost of shipping. 

Because the LoD were coming to me straight from Barcelona. They were international Road Warriors traveling to the banks of Philadelphia. 

But, I am so grateful for their place in my home and among the thrones of the other tag teams I have. 

LoD reigning above the other tag teams

This happened months before the passing of Road Warrior Animal. I hope LoD is partying in the great beyond; and on land in Pennsylvania, I had the two of them destroy the entirety of the collection of Cannarella tag team action figures. 

If you’ve made it this far, please give me recommendations for other matches to watch that you particularly enjoyed. WWF or WCW, no matter. 

And settle a debate. Candy Corn (my favorite candy): 

That’s it for now until I figure out what I’m doing with this space. My candy corn and I will see ourselves out until next time.

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