Every single day I promise to eat lunch at my office like a normal office drone that brown paper bags it. In an effort to not grow to the size of a planet with my advancing age, in my imagination those lunches are always ridiculously healthy: beet salads and the like.
that right there is a bagel with cream cheese topped with Cheez Its
But I just have such a hard time keeping promises to myself. Maybe I’ll just start going to the gym instead?
You life is not so great 