Tag Archives: holidays

And a Krampus in a pear tree

Merry Krampus

Merry Krampus

May Krampus wander the streets and terrify children with rusty chains and bells, bringing swift and beastly justice to naughty kids, during this special holiday season.

 

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Filed under art, doodles, Holidays, horrifying

Happy Spanksgiving

From You Life to you:

gobble, y'all

gobble, y’all

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Filed under Animals, art, doodles, Holidays

Holiday Hell Tour: A Molesty Santa

There are certain things that are sacred and unjoking in my [you] life and those are the traditions I have with my closest mates. For the last ten years we have celebrated two things: our own (un PC named) version of Thanksgiving ( see: youfood for the full update), and the other thing is our annual photo with Santa.

Look at those fly people

Look at those fly people

During the holidays tradition is important.

And one part of this holiday tradition is how much bad touching Santa seems to get away with when I sit on his lap.

In the past it was always just a joke pertaining to the fact that due to my size I would have to be the one perched on Santa’s lap. It was a perfect set up for a joke.

However this year Santa amped up his perv game. When I went to sit on his lap it seemed like awkward quarters, what with so many people flanking us. I ended up plopping onto Mrs. Klaus’s lap. So I popped up off her diminutive frame, but Santa full on grabbed my hips to “re-adjust me” on top his lap. And on the way down onto the holiday lap, Santa got a handful of my ass.

He has his hand on my freaking hip in this shot. Damn you, Santa!

He has his hand on my freaking hip in this shot. Damn you, Santa!

So, Santa is kind of a douche bag.

Happy holidays from You Life (and Bear Ambulance) to you

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Filed under cranky, friends, Holidays, horrifying

In celebration of more than one holiday at once

There are times when it isn’t enough to celebrate just one holiday at one time. So when Cinco de Mayo and Star Wars day are back to back it just seems more appropriate to meld them together:

Happy Cinco de Star Wars

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Filed under beer, Fashion, Holidays

Irish…eat your children

I love how holidays are documented on other lifestyle blogs. They’re cute as hell and the blogger is forever making some holiday themed craft. Go them! And the next day (or sometimes even a play-by-play while the holiday is happening) a thousand little instagram pictures are birthed and displayed all over the fucking internet.

Happy Easter!

But, since I have finally re-covered from my hangover, this is about my St. Patrick’s day…you will notice that the lives of my mates are also quite magical…

We do fanatically adorable and interesting things:

Like playing “chicken.” There are no winners

Or…this?

I honestly have no clue. At this point of the evening I had thrown a bottle of whiskey at an abandoned asbestos factory, and was then convinced that I had killed a bird in the process. My friends told me it was more likely a kitten that was killed.

I don’t even know what this is, but it’s pissing horrifying.

Hmmm. sweating a bunch in this horrifying photo that looks like the beginning of a snuff film. By this point of the evening I had taken a disco nap and woke up to find these shenanigans (hey! It is St. Patrick's Day) going on in the kitchen.

And then the next day you take a picture of what poverty looks like.

In this case it looks like pretzels for lunch and the many many many packets of McDonald’s ketchup that I ended up stealing…when I stole the entire condiment rack. And then got asked to never return to McDonald's hallowed establishment

 

Happy holidays, from my friends to you!

 

 

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Filed under beer, friends, horrifying, Philadelphia