REJOICE!
It’s the best day of the year for me.
BLESSED BE
In consideration of this celebration, I’ve compiled several resources to help you and your feline friend get the most out of your day:
Tag Archives: cats
Facebook ad targeting: the desolation of Janie
According to five minutes of internet research (actually it was twenty because I got distracted when I found that there was such a thing as an Archie Comics Twitter – what?!?!) I am a victim of Facebook ad targeting. And not in a nice way.
The d-bags at Facebook, who so recently told me I have no friends, have found a new way to demoralize me with their targeted attacks. Like, say, when you’re trying to mass-eat pretzels and chug down dollar wine with your best friends while catching up on Empire only to see that THIS is what Facebook thinks is most relevant to you based on advertisers (quote straight from the Facebook gods’ mouths):
Get[ting] the most value from your ad spend by reaching only the people that matter to you
Honestly…should I just end it? THANKS, THE INTERNET!
According to ad-space buyers and Facebook’s internet algorithms, the best ad choices for me only have to do with Walmart, cats, and litter.
Filed under cats, horrifying
The tears of an angel
The mighty Liono’s history is a mysterious one. And part of that mystery is how a former farm cat came into such wimpy vocal chords.
Behold the mighty and mightily pathetic roar of a imploring feline desperate to make friends with the maintenance man outside:
Better than that song that Ma$e and Puff Daddy did
There are few things better than when Ma$e and Puffy used to collaborate in shiny suits. But much like them, “can’t nobody hold me down,” especially in relation to the good things in life.
But my latest creation is better than Ma$e and Puff. It’s better than everything. I don’t know if good things existed before this. Good things didn’t exist before this
BOW TO ME, INTERNET
Filed under Animals, cats, pets, pizza, religion, the interwebz, Uncategorized
I wanna be where the people are. I wanna see, wanna see them dancin’
A few years ago I was on the phone with my mom and was telling her about my weekend plans and she responded with this direct (and haunting) quote:
You’ve got your cats and your knitting…sounds like you’re really clickin’ your heels over there in Philadelphia.
So…I tried to brush that off, but upon some re-inspection I might have to reevaluate all of my life choices, and drink a bottle [box] of wine, and cry while shout-singing “Part of Your World” to my feline companions.
Friday night. Just got paid. My cat found my knitting
…like, it’s not a GREAT feeling when even your cat kind of disrespects you
I’m ready to know what the people know!!!!!!
The Art of Conversation
if you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my cats
As much as I’d love to hear about your Mike and the Mechanics like relationship with your father, I’d prefer to just put on “In the Living Years,” if I wanted to hear about your childhood. Less you. More cats.
The soothing timbre of Liono
To help you get through your day here is a sound recording of Liono’s unbelievably loud snoring.
Now everyone feels better.
The most important thing you’ll ever vote on
Being able to vote is the privilege and honor of living in a free world. Granted, you might have thought that in the past your voice was used in order to make world changing decisions, however any past voting is inconsequential in comparison to this wildly difficult and new choice you’re being called to make.
Which cat litter is more hilarious?
It’s pride vs Jons in this battle for glory
Vote in the poll and leave a comment explaining your choice – one lucky person will win a prize straight from You Life. Let Democracy ring through the hearts of every voter.
Good luck, and God Bless.
Filed under cats, science! technology!
Always a consummate professional
When asked to represent ourselves on a whiteboard at work, I did so as only the most competent of employees would:
it’s a way of life
You life is not so great 