No, seriously. The company I work for is (inadvertent) comedic genius. It’s like the Andy Kaufman of failing businesses that are desperately trying not to close despite the fact that they’re trading as a penny stock now.
In an effort to test the waters of employee satisfaction, the company sent out a survey to ALL employees – including those in the Philadelphia office that just got entirely laid off.
Here are some of the winning gems plus, perhaps, some of the additional comments that a certain employee (IT’S ME) added to let them know my current level of satisfaction
these questions sound like my job is breaking up with me and we’re at the desperate ending “state of the union” sorta divorce stage. We’re also period’ing together
And the ultimate:
Well…you laid everyone off, so talk to me more about these advancement opportunities.
You life is not so great 