Category Archives: beer

Urban gardening

Sometimes You Life needs a guest who is doing the productive stuff. That is the case this week. I have done nothing in the creation of this; it is all the efforts of another.

My boyfriend has a backyard that is generally populated by junkyard cats (all of which we have named: Buster, Auntie, and the babies). It is also the home for a great deal of garbage that neighbors dump there instead of walking to the front of the complex. In an effort to create a hospitable environment for himself, and with the hopes that there might be summer barbecues in the backyard, boyfriend decided to turn his trash heap of a backyard into a garden.

This proved a problem due to the unusually large amount of cinderblocks dumped onto the land. But, always the optimist, boyfriend tilled the soil, got rid of the garbage, and used an old (soaking wet) mattress to turn the cinderblocks into the foundation for an urban garden.

We had the tools of the trade (mattress, beer, spray paint, and American pride) and urban gardening prevailed. You life is not so urban garden as ours.

Captains of industriousness!

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Filed under beer, crafts, Dumpster diving, gardening, Uncategorized

When life imitates art. Or blogs.

After a long night of listening to Liono (https://youlifeisnotsogreat.wordpress.com/2011/12/28/some-people-have-children/   ) playing with bottle caps I woke up early (noon) to get my weekend fix of fried potatoes and hot sauce.

And right outside my doorstep I ran into this guy:

You life is not so NASCAR

I don’t know exactly how to feel about Dale Earnhardt Jr. hanging out in the front of my apartment surrounded by empty cans of Natty Ice.

But, I’m not surprised.

 

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Filed under beer, cats, food, horrifying, Uncategorized

Jesus saves…on the purchase of a new blanket.

There are certain ways that I like to celebrate the end of the work week. My favorite, by far, is drinking Mickey’s grenades with my bearded boyfriend at our favorite bar.

It’s like Mickey’s normal 40oz and St. Patrick’s day had an adorable baby: an adorable, malt liquor, baby.

Then, I like to follow up those grenades with a bottle of white wine, chicken lo mein, and dancing to “Moves like Jagger” in my living room while “That Thing You Do!” plays on the VHS in the background.

It’s boyfriend’s favorite movie, and I love him despite that.

The next morning, I like to get up late and walk to the local 7-ll to get my life’s blood (yellow Gatorade). All of these things are a blissfully normal routine for us, except something strange happened this week that was significantly different.

I had donned my laziest weekend attire and set off for my destination.

a green overcoat with my Power Puff girl pajama pants and flats with flowers on them.

En route I encountered a rowdy group of “Jesus Saves” people. They were nice enough and enthusiastically jolly, so I stopped while they were frantically yelling at me. Had it been angry zealots I would have moved right along, but these people seemed to be a combination of happy and brief. They handed me my pamphlet,

Good question!

and then the amazingly disturbing thing happened. They handed me a blanket…because they thought I was homeless.

An unused blanket that I could make into a tent in which to live.

At first I felt the need to explain: I’m lazy; I live next door to 7-11; I have no reservations about looking like a slob on a Saturday afternoon; I do, in fact, rent a home. But then I thought about how cold my apartment is and how my current blanket is looking a bit rough.

I took the blanket.

So I took the pamphlet and blanket, put my Gatorade in my pocket, and proceeded to Dunkin Donuts where the man behind the counter also thought I was homeless (but in his case he was just frightened; no free salt bagels and coffee there).

As it turns out Jesus did indeed save me a trip to the store and money for a blanket. Thanks Jesus!

 

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Filed under beer, Fashion, food, travel

A peak into the life

I thought it might be interesting to get sneak peeks into the actual world of ‘You Life.’

The first installment is “what is in my refrigerator?” Here’s a look:

the breakfast of champions

It is stocked with all of the essentials: an empty metal thermos, the cheapest tall boy I could find, the dredges of a diet coke, and a box of cotton candy fudge.

And, in case I run out of room in my bite-sized apartment, I can always use my fridge for storage.

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Filed under beer, cooking

Cooking and clarifications.

Like most bloggers I have a Zen for cooking and the finer things. Becoming a foodie was one of my aspirations when I turned twenty-three. As it turns out, there are certain things that a foodie needs: mainly food and kitchen appliances. So, when I search through my kitchen cupboard now at the age of twenty-seven, I discover that it has become a graveyard for old cartons of food: the wrappers of Twinkies and ancient boxes of Tastykake’s Kandy Kakes.

The moral of this story is that I don’t have much in the way of food or kitchen appliances. But never fear! You can make delicious tasty treats without the aid of fancy kitchen appliances. A person doesn’t need a dehydrator, iron skillet, blender, or even forks to make a wonderful meal.
That brings us to the picture on my header.


Those up there are the most delicious mashed potatoes that the East Coast has to offer. And what’s the best part? I didn’t use a masher. Why? I don’t have one because I believe it is a frivolous waste of money in these trying economic times. Instead, I spent masher money on a delicious craft beer in the style of George Washington’s porter. Then, I used the bottle to mash the potatoes. GW would have been so proud to see my industrious spirit in the face of adversity, just like during the Revolution. (You will see in the background that my friend was making his own mashed potatoes using a potato masher. He chose those because he is a British loyalist that only appreciates colonialism and hatred).

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Filed under beer, cooking

How to make an ashtray

Here is a really quick craft project that will only take a few moments to create. I call it “how to make an ashtray.”

Step 1: Go to the store. I like to go to a deli that is close to my apartment, the proximity is key seeing as how I don’t own a car, don’t have a license, and don’t know how to drive.

Step 2: Purchase a forty. I like Colt 45, but Mickey’s is especially dear to me. Also, Hurricane is good.

Step 3: Go home and drink the forty.

Step 4: Get cigarettes. I am smoking Pall Mall Lights because I used to smoke Parliament Lights and Pall Mall Lights are like Parliaments for poor people.

Step 5: Light cigarette. I used a barbecue lighter because I don’t know where my actual lighters or matches went. You can also use the stove or toaster.

Step 6: Flick ash into empty forty.

Congratulations! You just made your very own ashtray!

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Filed under beer, crafts